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Tue, Aug. 26th, 2008, 10:47 am
I'm tired and sad and blegh so I'll make this snappy

So Alex Jones and his various assorted crazies took time off from jabbering about black helicopters or whatever and showed up at the DNC to protest because they hate the Democrats for various reasons. And then Michelle Malkin showed up and started taking pictures of everybody, presumably for a fair-minded and balanced oh who am I kidding I can't even type this sentence. She's there to find the weirdest idiots she can post their pictures (and, hey, their addresses maybe) and try to tie them to mainstream liberals and say, "See?"

So Alex Jones sees Michelle Malkin and starts yelling at her, for various reasons. Alex Jones does not, in general, need reasons to yell.

This becomes, in the mind of Gateway Pundit:
"Leftists Ambush Michelle Malkin!"

And, OK.

If Alex Jones is a "leftist" I'm a cold bowl of cereal. If Alex Jones is a "leftist" then I'm a car battery in July. You can argue back and forth about how exactly to categorize Alex Jones' Crazed Libertarian deal, but pretty much all you need to know is that he thinks Obama is a secret Muslim. HE'S NOT ONE OF OURS.

Second, I'm not sure how Michelle Malkin got "ambushed" by, uh, showing up at a pre-scheduled demonstration. Like, Alex Jones showing up at the hotel bar during Malkin's "Lock Up All the Coloreds Except For Me"-themed cocktail hour, that's an ambush.

Third, I love seeing all the commentors on GP's site saying, basically, "Alex Jones, like all liberals, hates freedom of speech, so someone ought to lock him in jail for what he just said."

(And, subset of point the Third, kudos to all of the idiots on GP's site linking the behavior of people protesting the DNC with the DNC itself. "This is what Democrats are like." No, asshole. The Democrats are inside the building. Nice try, though.)

Fourth, Alex Jones is an asshole, but if you think some random guy in the background yelling "Kill Michelle Malkin" translates to a literal attempt on Michelle Malkin's life, as though the guns and knives were about to come out, you're an idiot. THIS IS AN ATTEMPT ON SOMEONE'S LIFE, stupid. (Oh, hey, look at the names of the guys who got arrested. It appears that Nyet was on a meth prowl, like he does.)

Fifth, I hate Alex Jones and Michelle Malkin so so so very much that I really really really wanted them to lock eyes at some point while he was screaming at her and then, "Shut up and kiss me!" and they get married and have the babies.

Tue, Aug. 26th, 2008 03:25 pm (UTC)

I hate Michelle Malkin, I hate her I hate her I hate her. I hate her more than the girls who were mean to me in middle school.

Tue, Aug. 26th, 2008 03:33 pm (UTC)

I have no doubt in my mind that Michelle Malkin was unspeakably horrible in middle school.

Tue, Aug. 26th, 2008 03:34 pm (UTC)

Me neither. But she makes me want to dump pig's blood on her in front of everyone. GOD. HATE.

Tue, Aug. 26th, 2008 04:10 pm (UTC)
ext_84511: Yowza

Yes! I was listening to NPR in the car this morning and heard that I tried to kill the would-be president. I immediately called Beck, and she refused to give an alibi. I feel like Elaine's boyfriend Joel Rifkin.

(Yes, I looked that up).

Tue, Aug. 26th, 2008 04:16 pm (UTC)
christastrophe: Re: Yowza

Wow. I had to look that up, too, and I'm a fanatic. Very nice reference there.

That's why I love Seinfeld. Any other show would've used, like, Manson. Dahmer. South Park would have used Dahmer.

Anyway, you're going to jail goodbye meth and guns fiend.

Tue, Aug. 26th, 2008 04:25 pm (UTC)
12gaugestring: Re: Yowza

more like meth and guns friend

Tue, Aug. 26th, 2008 04:26 pm (UTC)
christastrophe: Re: Yowza

friend of meth and guns who is a fiend

Tue, Aug. 26th, 2008 04:29 pm (UTC)
squibbohere: Re: Yowza

these pretzels are making me thirsty

Tue, Aug. 26th, 2008 09:32 pm (UTC)
12gaugestring: Re: Yowza