christastrophe (christastrophe) wrote,

bells and whistles

For some unimaginable reason, I have a Livejournal and a Facebook and a Twitter and a Tumblr. To say nothing of the ol' MySpaces and Friendster and Photobucket and Youtube and Reverb Nation and God why god why god why.

So many ways to talk to no one.

See, Livejournal is for deeper thoughts, of which I have had none that I care to share lately. Anything somewhat deeper and baby-related goes on the Tumblr baby blog, which I like because it's easier to upload media (like baby pictures) and there's no comments, because if I want opinions on raising my son I will solicit them. Say, on Facebook, where I am learning not to talk about politics. But also I don't want to be tiresome with baby updates, so then to the baby blog. And then the Twitter, which I basically have just to follow a ton of people/businesses I'm interested in and occasionally say something dopey. And post links to my Tumblr.


It all feels very silly, sillier than it certainly ever felt to write everything I was feeling in real time on this blog for the past I-don't-want-to-think-about-how-many years. I guess the point is that I sure do miss having everybody in one room, and I love how the internet has enabled me to see what everybody's up to, because I am everybody's aunt or something.

I am a sad bear, because my paternity leave is over tomorrow and I'm going to miss my son and my wife and my mommy. I will be thinking of them all day. I will print out multiple pictures of my son as soon as I get to work. I hate that this is the start of a long life of me going to work and missing out on everything. Wish I could be a stay-at-home dad. Or, at least, a work but have my son with me dad. Something.

Anyway, as with all other aspects of my life, I have thrown myself in with total abandon and now I'm one of those psychotics that can't bear to be away from their children even for a moment. I knew I would be like this. I feel everything times a billion. I go for it. Sometimes, in going for it, I blow it. That's a part of it, I guess.

So now I'm going back to work and I'm making too big a deal out of it, or am I? I don't even know. Do other dudes who have to go back to work feel like taking to their proverbial livejournal when it's time? Dunno. I don't know shit about other dads. I'll search Eric's LJ later when I can't sleep. Watching with great love and worry over my amazing little dude.

Anyway, I notice that LJ now gives you the option to link entries to your Twitter and Facebook, which I will not do for now because, oh sometimes how I feel like this is all so dumb.

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